HIPP SIPS!

Cheers to You, Cheers to Us!

Redefine how you drink & how you think!

Living HIPP, is a lifestyle brand that promotes being happy (and healthy), being inspired (and intentional), being productive & peaceful, women crave peace and it is because we need to disrupt the expectations and how we live.

The truth is, we have to live differently…..

The expectation and landscape for the modern day woman is a MYTH.

She does not do it all, she can’t, she is not that social, pretty and without pain, it it total BS.

We are taught to do it all (and some of it is well worth it and quite frankly, what I wanted):

—The Beautiful Home

—The Beautiful Family

—The Successful Career/Business

—The Volunteer & Stay at Home Mom

—The Pre Baby Body

—The woman that flows, does yoga, does not break a sweat and meditates (Squirrel)

—Raise great humans

—Make everyone happy and accept you

—Look like you have it all together

—Look Beautiful

—Do all the Things

The past decade has made it all worst, and it was hard more than a decade ago…..

Social Medial, also known as the “comparison reel”. We listen to the influencers, we see the highlight reels, we compare those beautiful lifestyle photos to our reality when in fact they are just “Kodak Moments” for those of you who are younger, it basically means they are just captured moments, the pictures we take, the stories we share. There is nothing wrong with them, share them, share your wins, your wonderful and joyful moments, share the love, we don’t want to see complaints and woe is me on SM. However, remember in your scroll, to know that when you see others highlights, remember, that is exactly what they are. We all have the BTS story, situation, struggle or season (none of us are immune to that).

Let’s not judge it, judge ourselves, judge each other…..

Let’s just celebrate life together, and understand, life is our gift, and when we live it with gratitude, presence and a positive spirit, it is that much better. We also need to be willing to grow, willing to get uncomfortable, willing to be vulnerable and willing to fail. This is how we evolve, success or Living HIPP is not a straight line, it is in fact a scribble (a toddler one at best).

We hide behind the veneer at times, which is okay, but don’t allow yourself to go too far. The veneer can be many things, it can be a busy schedule, a fashion statement, a distraction, or anything positive or negative. It can also be the numbing out which we confuse for chilling out. We all need an escape, but unfortunately what we think of as the escape we love, often can become the escape that brings us down. The example for many (and we just don’t talk about it) is DRINKING. Yep. That thing that helped us belong, be cool, be included, melt our nerves, feel confident, be funnier, be fun, be real, be festive, be relaxed, be nice, be a people person, lets admit it, it worked, for many of us. But let me share the other side that we don’t talk about, that is real, that is truth, and it is killing our true and authentic joy. It is not only our drinking, it is also our thinking….

While we think it does these things, it actually does not do any of them….

You have been duped, in a big way…. Does it mean you need to not drink, no, it just means you should really explore your relationship with it, and if it is something you can’t live without, that is a sure sign you are addicted (I’m sorry, no one tells you this because addiction is scary, it is a wide spectrum, and you don’t drink out of control, or in the morning, or like the horror stories you see in the movies or you hear about. No, you just like to drink and you say “in moderation"….. I get it because that was me, and I did not want to quit, I did not want to “get sober” and I did not see myself as this rock bottom person, I had my shit together, and I worked hard to keep it in check. The black & white boxes we use, keep us stuck and in the grey, which is in our heads, which if we could see the bubbles over your head, it would not be warm and fuzzy, not when it comes to the WHOLE story.

Living HIPP started over a decade ago because I completely distrusted my habits, daily priorities, lifestyle and self care. I put myself first like never before, I discovered yoga, I discovered my relationship with Alcohol (and Food) and I changed it, I did better…. I was so mindful, that I did not completely give it up (I was not ready to say that or do that, note: it still had a hold on me), I was just limited in doing it. This worked until it did not work. But I believe it is okay to say, that is part of the process, reduction, removal, rethink, relapse, rinse, repeat, and it becomes like a diet, and the back and forth thing can really suck.

You can be on the AF Diet, and do that until you finally embrace the AF lifestyle, which is freedom from the social pressure, the self pressure/thinking, the desire (I know, I loved it too) and the demise (hangovers and 3am wake ups suck).

Living HIPP became my tracks to run on. When I was Living HIPP, I was AF. I use to like to drink, it was part of my personality, and while not a big drinker, I let it become an important part of my life (can’t we just drink beer on a Friday night). I was not a take it or leave it type, I liked it, I enjoyed the ceremony of it, the gathering, the letting loose, all those things that I associated with it, it was the reward at the end of the day (or so I thought). I was giving it up without a commitment with hopes I would no longer want it, but I still thought of it as the elixir that helped me to connect w/people, chill out, have fun, and all those things I conditioned myself to believe.

Back to the truth…..

The truth is, it was no longer any of these things to me. I am not a person that enjoys just one, or having to think about managing it, that mental gymnastics can drive you batty. Likewise, I was a middle age woman, still thinking to some degree that it made me cool, I liked being the party girl, and I liked the people that could chill (truth, I still do). I had to look at the facts…. The truth was it made me feel like shit. It never made me more fun, sloppy maybe, louder maybe but honestly, it was no longer that for me. It felt good for the first 30 minutes (okay hour) and then the rest of the time I was just chasing that feel good buzz (which you never get after that first 20 minutes (or lets say hour), you just get tired, sloppy and back in the drinking loop. I missed it thou…. This was a few years back but I missed it. I loved being AF but I could not commit to forever, and I did not want to be Sober Sally, the buzz kill of the party scene. I still liked the party scene or the drinks before dinner, or sitting outside al fresco, or by the fire, or the ritual of the gathering, the light hearted spirits, when people are nice and chill. We think it is the booze, in fact, we think that not only for ourselves but also for others. It could be in part, but the whole story, the whole life, the whole scene says otherwise. We see the vision of people having fun, the drinks are flowing and the party is going…. What we don’t see is the sloppy ending (for some). We don’t see or talk about is the late night, middle of the night or the next morning. It could just be passing out, only to wake up in the middle of the night with a racing heart, anxiety, pounding head ache and dry mouth. Maybe it is just waking up and not falling back to sleep (it does that to our bodies), then being foggy or fuzz the next day, but we shake it off, suck it up and say we won’t do it again or that night, and then there we are, breaking our promise to ourselves. This is addiction. Alcohol is addictive, and even if we are not physically addicted (like the scary stories) it is in our system, and it our body craves it again, that is how it works. Rinse/Repeat, sign up for the 5K, maybe that will get you on track again….

What if you lived differently?

What if you drank less? When you like it it is hard to manage and do less, I did this, it worked until it did not, that is why sober people make the decision to be sober, they finally get it out of their lives, and address the reasons they drank (ate, worked, what ever) in the first place. What if it didn’t have to be punitive, filled with shame, labels, black & white thinking etc…. That has been my journey with Living HIPP, I did not plan it, it is what happened…. There does come a time where the breaks are not good enough, and you want this to not have power over you (which is hard because society loves it, as does big alcohol, the marketing has duped most of us, me included).

I am speaking up because I just want to level the playing field and call it what it is…. Toxic. Yep, you can still have it, but let’s at least be clear on what it is, a toxic substance that we revere, and think is the answer for everything. Even wellness professionals will teach you how to moderate, which is a joke because that is not the goal (even thou we think it is). The goal is not to desire it. The goal is to have so much fucking fun, real conversations and joy without it. The goal is to see it for what it is, a carcinogen that wreaks havoc on your body. Now, if you don’t see it a problem in your life, have at it, my friends and family indulge. Let’s stop glorifying it, that shit has to end. It does not relax you, in fact, it makes you more anxious and depressed (TRUTH). It is not a reward, it is a liability that compromises how you act, feel and live. It does not make you more fun, it is fake fun, I did not know that until I learned genuine real fun (but no offense because I get it has been fun for many of us). It does not make you sexier or prettier, it actually makes you look sloppy and like shit. There is ZERO benefit to drinking, no it is not good for your heart, many people die because of it but it is under the cause of “heart disease”. TRUTH. Health: Alcohol increases risk of heart disease, stroke, cancer, brain disease/memory loss, IBS, accidents and making an ass out of yourself. Beauty: this golden elixir or “clear/clean” (BS) makes your skin look like shit, red/blotchy/dull, weight gain, bad breathe, dull eyes, puffy eyes and a good chance you will eat like crap that night or the next day. It is CRAZY to me the marketing and story we fell for, I fell for, and I did the research, and I can tell you I finally walked away, for good!

Sober is boring! Yes and no…. I think the word is boring and I don’t like some of the beliefs out there and I don’t agree with all of the approaches because there is a spectrum, and we need to honor the process more. All approaches work, I just think people need to find what works for them. I borrowed what I liked, I plugged into likeminded groups, and also am speaking up about it as a lifestyle choice, and the process (because not everyone is at rock bottom). I break it down in these steps, it is not Recovery to me, it is Discovery. 1. Reduce/Research 2. Remove/Recover 3. Rebuild/Rebrand 4. Freedom Cheers to all, the drinkers, the non drinkers and having no shame in this game!!!!!! To be clear, I think sober people are bad ass, my approach is about positive mindset/living, empowerment and redefining how we have fun.

So why give it up, why not just do it once in a while….

Great question and the one question everyone asks or tries to answer for themselves….

I tried, it does not work that way…. The truth is, I am so much better AF, and deciding to walk away for good “I don’t drink anymore”, gave me a freedom I have always wanted, but did not know how to achieve. I have an addictive personality, so I tend to go big or go home (balance is key, and I try to apply that to most areas of my life). Trying to keep drinking in my life is way too much work, if it isn’t the drinking (and shitty feeling that comes with it), it is the thinking, and caring so much about it—it is such a waste of time, energy and life. I love the rituals and the experiences, so I still do them, it is more about the getting together or the memory than it is about the drink, we just think it is the drink because it immediately calms our nerves so we want that feeling. It is a behavior change, which takes time. For most, there does come a time when you are done with your back and forth or having this be your thing, you try to prove otherwise, but this is your thing.

I no longer count days, I did the first year or the time I had to start again (which I don’t recommend but that is my story). I wasn’t that bad, that thought kept me stuck in a place of not allowing it to click into FREEDOM. I had to realize this….. It wasn’t that good…. my belief system needed to change and I to rewire my beliefs, and I also had to navigate a way to have fun, to be me, to show up authentically and unapologetically me, and also respect others for where they are at. Stop the shame and blame, let’s just cheers each other on!

I’ve decided I will count years, because I did enough of the Day 1’s, 30/60/90 day cycles, I am just in it, this is how I live, I am not going anywhere in terms of a goal, because I met all the milestones, all the holidays, the travel, the loss, the firsts of everything the year of freedom, all of it. I am just me. Living my best life and inspiring others to do the same. Do you need to be AF to live HIPP, no, but I will ask you to explore your relationship with it and hopefully change it (a process you begin, and I have some great resources for you).

Each month I reward myself with a Spa Day or a Spa Service.

It is hard being AF in an Alcohol obsessed world. I still like to party…. Yep, and I do, I just don’t have alcohol in my drink. I sing, I dance, I raise a glass (and I insist on a fancy glass)…. I just don’t have alcohol in mine and it is the best decision I have made for myself—it is in fact my super power. It did not start that way, and I think it is okay for people to explore this. But let’s stop pretending that alcohol is the answer as it very much is the demise for many. Also, let’s be inclusive of each other…. You want a drink, go for it. You are not drinking, cool. Let’s normalize being inclusive, that it really doesn’t matter what is in your glass, it matters how you show up for yourself. I call this HIPP SIPS, it is our ability to raise a glass together, an AF option or your drink of choice, lets just raise the bar (pun intended) on how we socialize, how we gather and disrupt the narrative on having fun.

Cheers to us!