2020 Back to School - The Lessons Beyond the Classroom!

Back to school this year, is something we could never have imagined or expected, and here we are, a Pandemic, I feel like we are in the eye of the storm, but we don’t know what lies ahead.  We are in the middle of a Pandemic, something this country has not seen in over 100 years, we can agree it is an unprecedented time—to that end, it takes unprecedented action.  

My son is a Senior in HS, we are starting out remote with a chance we will go hybrid come October.  Personally I wanted to see them go back in the classroom, because I feel now is the time as the winter months could bring an increase in infection and we might all be sheltered in place (we just don’t know).   I also wanted accommodations made for teachers (high risk), to teach their class remotely while the kids are in the classroom (these are my personal opinions of what I wanted to see happen, based on the data and guidelines for the state).    It is September, and here we are, remote learning at home when we could be in school, outdoors, interacting, before the cold weather and possibly surge requires a shut down.   Across the country so many are either remote, hybrid or in school, depending on the area you live in, but for all of us, it is different, and we are all trying to embrace the “new normal”.   

As a parent, I feel for my son, it’s his Senior year, this really sucks. I also feel like we are robbed as parents, this is it for us, our babies last “back to school”, an end of an era, I want him to experience it all and the feeling of Fall, Football games, friends at school, that exciting and at times daunting high school experience.   

As I gave thought to all of this, I did what I always do…. I have my moment, I express myself, I try to better understand decisions or look at the other point of view, and I then accept this is the decision and I need to move forward.   Moving forward and complaining about how much this sucks is not enough, it is never enough for me.  I need to remind myself to look at the good, there is always good, there is always light in the dark, and there is most definitely always a lesson (and yes, an opportunity to grow).  

The lesson is for me, because I need to go through this process to model it in a way for my son (whether or not he picks up on it, I see it unfold and have this knowing this will serve him some day).   In this very moment (and after complaining myself), I pause, and I think and I remind myself subconsciously to some degree that I am raising either a blamer, a complainer or a leader—so while we all agree this sucks, and we all agree we should have gone back in person, the dialogue stops there, it shifts to what WE can do, how WE can make the best of it and we pivot (we pivot our attitude)!  

So beyond the, this sucks, and all the reasons we want to get back to normal, get them back in the classroom and the real valid concerns from all of us parents, let us be reminded of the benefit which we are not seeing but they are getting one of the greatest life lessons.  With my son, I just casually say and we both point out the benefits, yes this is a bummer, but here is what is good: literally roll out of bed (no drive), slippers on, gaming during the day, kick ass lunches, nice breaks during the day, puppies in between classes.   And quietly I know, that while we would both choose for him to be in school, next year he will be away, so I know in my heart, we will look at this time as a gift.  

The Lesson:   Attitude.  

So what are we teaching and why don’t we use this time to shift how we teach our kids (hello education reform)!  

ATTITUDE.  LEADERSHIP.  LIFE SKILLS.  TEAMS. 

If I could rewrite lessons plans from high school that I failed so miserably on (and to this day have never ever ever used)—I would write courses on the following as curriculum:

—Leadership: integrity, hard work, commitment, positive attitude, personal development, people oriented, team work, courage, brave, vulnerability, strategy, collaboration, inclusion, diversity, service.  

—Attitude: mindset, gratitude, compassion, positivity, shifting, acceptance.  

—Life Skills: mind/body/spirit, self assessment/aware, time management, executive functioning/organization, balance, vision & goal setting, alignment, core values, problem solving, communication, presentation, personal brand, authenticity, social media detox, meditation, exercise, diet, career, hobbies/interests, family/friends, kindness, community, diversity, creativity, discovery.  

—Team Work:  collaboration, edification, inclusion, respect, managing conflict, setting expectations, tolerance, style comprehension, empathy, listening skills, communication skills, project planning, formation, performance, recognition, guiding principles, rules of engagement, positivity, supportive, common goal/common good, kindness.  

Obviously all of the above are weaved into the curriculum to some degree and in some way, however, there is too much, too many lessons (academic), too much testing (numbers and pressure) and not enough on Life & Leadership Skills which by far are what will not only help these students as individuals but will help our world be a better place.  

So the lesson this school year needs to come from us as parents and teachers alike.  Our ability to take on this unprecedented time, and not only survive but to thrive.  To make the best of the situation, and when we do, we (they) will look at this and know they can handle the next challenge coming their way, and how they stuck together as either a family, a class, a school, a community and as a country.  

We are in this right now, so I don’t expect us to be so forward thinking, and to breeze over the challenge we all face in this: it is real, and it is hard.  However, we do have a choice, we can’t control the decisions made, we can’t control the things that are simply out of our control, what we can control is our mindset and how we react.   It is our job (I believe) as parents and as community members (in our respective communities) to lead with a positive attitude, lead with kindness, lead with a spirit of team work (we are in this together, stop blaming the world), lead with faith and belief that we will get through this, lead with generosity, who can you help, who can you support and who can you lift up.   We can go down with the blamers and complainers (have your tantrum but get over it), or we could rise up with the ones that choose to operate from a place of love/kindness/compassion and tolerance.  So, my guess is that every student in 2020, while frustrated (and rightfully so), will gain the most life lessons and opportunities that will serve them a lifetime.  How can we ask ourselves when it comes to how we were living and learning and say, is there a better way?  What can we learn from this?  How can we shift how we live and teach and invest more time in the things that really matter: life skills, mindset, self care, time management, and bottom line: how to be a good human (why can’t it be that simple)! 

So, if you are a parent reading this and you feel frustrated, I hear you, I get it, and let's have our tantrum and move on.  What can you do in your home (regardless of ages of your kids) to make it fun, to make it meaningful, and also to give yourself grace when it is falling apart.

Remember, we’ve got this!   We can do hard things, and even thou we don’t see it on the lesson plan, the lesson is one of the greatest lessons your child will receive this school year and beyond, don’t miss out on the opportunity to learn together, have fun together, and embark on new thought patterns, mindset and attitude—it is everything!!!!!!  XO