September Planning in 2020, the Covid Edition
It’s that time of year, and in 2020, it is the year and season of the unknown.
We have all been thrown off track in a big way with a Global Pandemic, it has impacted so many and as we begin a new season, we do not know exactly what to expect, and many are left in the abyss of the unknown, it is not a comforting place to be.
Typically this time of year is back to school for Moms, and back to business for those of us that work, it is a time to get organized, sharpen the pencil on our year end goals, and enter this season with clarity in the chaos of life—it usually takes the month to ramp up and truly get into the new routine and schedule, at least for this Mom Boss!
Like many of you, I am feeling a bit anxious, I don’t like not knowing how the school year will play out, I don’t like that I don’t have my routine to settle in to like I normally would if this Pandemic were not our reality. So, as I share here it is from a place of vulnerability because these are things I work on, these are things I do as I try and navigate this “new normal” as we are calling it. I miss my freedom, I miss the schedule that I knew, the enjoyment of seeing my kids thrive and be free, I miss my yoga studio, I miss it all!
Tantrum: Before we get in to some solutions and tools, let me just have a tantrum for a minute. I hate this, I am so mad for my kids at college, I am so mad for my son starting his Senior year, knowing he will most likely be home and not with his peers. I hate that these fleeting times and years are getting ambushed by this virus. I am mad at our President and lack of leadership, he did not cause the virus but he has not taken the action that is necessary, and don’t even get me going on the division in our country. I hate bullies, and the man leading this country is nothing but a bully. Ugh, my emotions run high, my anxiety is high and I don’t like this. This SUCKS! End of rant.
I added my tantrum because I want you to know I am never all rainbows and unicorns, in fact, I’m full of so many emotions and anger, anxiety, sadness, to name a few are part of my daily experience, and for this reason, I leverage tools, practices and actions that help me navigate this challenging time.
We cannot control the world around us, but what we can control is how we react.
Here are some steps to take to ensure you are embracing the season the best that you can, it is work but it is so worth it, because it allows you the opportunity to do your part, and your part is working on you, it is doing the best that you can, it is not complaining or blaming (sure, u can have your tantrum, but then move on, take action, take charge of your mindset, your example, and your life)!
1. Decide
Take ownership of your life, this season and decide to do what you can to make the best of this situation. Part of this is acceptance, being willing to realize you cannot control it, and letting that go, and looking at what you can control: your attitude, your daily actions, and how you show up in the world. Decide to be positive, too be part of the solution, to practice grace, empathy, kindness, flexibility and authenticity.
2. Practice Gratitude
Gratitude helps with your Attitude, and your attitude will be important to continue to work on this season and beyond. List 5 things you are grateful for each day. It might be the big things in life or it could be something as simple as coffee. This practice grounds you, shapes your attitude and will help you from the negative thoughts swirling around in your head, to shift to the positive, the possible and the blessings.
3. Magical Mornings
This practice helps me tremendously, especially if I find myself in reactive mode or on the hamster wheel of life. Magical Mornings are the time I dedicate in the morning to filling my cup, the physical cup gets coffee (so pour yourself some coffee or tea) and the most important part is filling my mind with good thoughts, inspiring reading and time to mediate and reflect on my day, my life, my thoughts, my mindset. There are many tools you can use, and I switch out various ones, depending on where I am at and/or how dedicated I am to this practice. Here are some tools I use: devotionals, prayer, self improvement books, journaling, affirmations/mantras, gratitude journal, vision board, Dharma Alter (yoga practice w/a place to meditate), breathing/reflection time. Even if you use one of these tools each morning, dedicating 15 minutes, it will ground you for the day—mind/body/spirit, it is nutrition for your mind & soul, it is a big part of Living HIPP!
4. Self Care
There has never been a more important time for so many of us, than the need to practice self care. Self Care is also Self Love, it is a practice where you are in this process of self discovery, what works for you and what does not serve you. We gloss over this topic all too often, because we either think we don’t have the time, we are in denial, we are too focused on others, we confuse it with being selfish, but self care is one of the most important topics when it comes to your life. Start out with the basics, and access where you are: Sleep, Eating, Hydrating (are you getting enough water), Exercise, Mind Health, Community/Connection, Spiritual Practice. Just by reading this list, you will know the top 1 or 2 areas you need to work on, take them on first, add them to your daily work, and come up with a plan to improve that area of your life. When I don’t focus on this area, I go way off course, so when I get too busy or don’t focus, I find myself in reactive and survival mode, which has such a negative impact on how I feel. Be sure to plan out your daily self care routine, and write down and commit to the things that will help ground you, care for you so that you can care for others.
5. The Family Schedule (or your schedule)
Your calendar/planner is one of your greatest tools, it can get you from overwhelm (which I find myself in that state often) to organized and on purpose. A few tips to run your calendar, and something I have been doing and teaching for over 2 decades. First, write in all the absolutes: this might be kids school schedule or pick ups/drop offs, appointments (for some of you it could be home schooling time). Write in your work schedule and for those of you that are self employed like me, write in the hours you will dedicate to your business.
Many are truly struggling with kids at home, home school demands and you don’t have much of a break (I feel for you and I know it is difficult, frustrating and the pressure is real)—somehow carve out time for the kids to do their school work, have their quiet time and allow yourself time to do your work. My advice is to give them quality of time, so when you are with them, truly be with them, but when it is time for your work, allow them a show, video game or some way to have them have their quiet time while you work. Make sure your calendar is aligned with your vision and you add things and activities that move you in the direction you want to go—look at your calendar differently (discerning) this season so that you spend your time in the way that you want to spend it (not just have to spend it)!
6. Create a Joy List
Brainstorm a list of things that bring you joy. This will help you to lead your life in a way (in the midst of the chaos) to truly appreciate the simple things in life and to acknowledge the simply joys. Remember and practice that these simple joys are things you can experience throughout the day—this allows us to be more mindful, to be aware of the beauty around us, the gifts we experience each day, and especially when things go awry (which they always do), we can then redirect and find solace in the simple joys in each day. I will just name a few of mine to get you thinking: sunshine on my face, the birds singing outside, my first sip of coffee, my kids laughter, my dogs excited to see me, the smell of the ocean, the pretty trees that surround me, belly laughs….
7. Keep it Simple & Lean
There has never been a better time to simplify our lives and this can happen in so many areas. Number one, only put things on your calendar and/or list that truly matter—gone are the days where you rush, and do it all, now is the time to realize it was all a circus, the amount of stuff and busy schedules in our lives now cries for less, less clothes, less distractions, less relationships that don’t matter, less stuff in general. It is a great season to declutter, this process is always cleansing and just feels good. Take on either one room at a time or even one area of a room at a time, if you don’t love it, then donate/discard it. Do the same for the people in your life, only surround yourself with those that build you up, that you enjoy and gently let go of the rest. I realized through Covid that I have been so busy in my life, that I have not reached out to so many friends that I don’t see all the time, but I care about and this Fall I am going to make an effort to reach out, even thou I can’t see them, I can make those important connections to life long friends. Who can you reach out to today?
8. To Do List
I am a fan of the list, I run my life by a list, and there are times I am super productive and other times that I just focus on the top 3 things. Lists help us organize our thoughts, they help us to get it off our mind, and into action—and capture both the mundane and the important tasks be it life/work/self. When my list gets steal, or I am no longer inspired, I start a new list (for some reason this one act gets me fired up again, and productive). My list is usually two columns Home & Business—the home column is anything to do with my home & family from call the painter to schedule Colby’s dentist appointment. My business to do is to schedule an event to reach out to this person about starting a business with Beautycounter or write blog post for Living HIPP. When I am super intentional w/a focus on self care, I have my own little list of things to do each day with a box to check: 70 ounces of water, podcast/walk, exercise, yoga, etc….
Lists shouldn’t be daunting (although admittedly there are times they get that way), if you feel that, reboot and start a new list, feel the vibe and energy to crank through your list but carving out time to do so. A new list is always a fresh start for me, ignite your inspiration, motivation and momentum by starting a new list!
9. Set Goals
Vision and goals truly get us from going through the motions and reactive mode to being on purpose, living with intention and of having a vision of where we want to be and the goals help us to take action on how to get there. Each month I set both business and personal goals, and if I am honest, usually one takes presidence over the other (although it does not have to, but that is how it often works out for me). While I have my goals for the month, I often break them up both weekly and/or daily, depending on what it is I am working on.
There are times when I need to work on my personal goals more than my business goals, because lets face it, if I am not feeling whole or the best I can, the business goals just are not as meaningful or impactful—if I am at my best, my ability to attack my business goals usually is far greater. There is an ebb and flow to this, and this will allow you to work on what is most important to you at the time. Setting goals has been the road map of my life, from the time that I first got myself in to college, at that young age, I lived it, I created a different life because of it, I am a huge believer in goal setting. Vision setting is an even bigger topic, and I believe in this with my whole heart, and actually did this from a young age (not even knowing what it was). I had a bulletin board on my wall as a teen, with words that inspired me, pictures I loved and I visualized what I wanted and how I wanted to be. It is how I live my life to this day, it is so powerful and while we are in the middle of a Pandemic, we still need to have a vision of our future, our best version, and align our daily life in a way that is congruent with that vision.
10. Have Fun!
Back in my Training & Development days where I facilitated leadership and team building sessions in my Corporate career, we always added as a last step, Have Fun! It’s weird to add but isn’t it so important to add? In my life, fun has been the main theme in what I wanted my entire life. When it came to a boy or husband, he had to be fun. When it came to work, it had to be fun, when it came to friends, they had to be fun. When it came to myself (and all the underlying feelings of anxiety or reservation), I had to be fun & have fun. For years (and years and years) having fun usually mean’t drinking (and yes, there were many fun times, I’m not gonna lie), but that is not the fun I am talking about (and lets be honest, it is not always fun)!
I’m talking about the genuine belly laughs, the taking a break from working hard and just having fun. If I think about this as a Mom with littles, perhaps it is a spontaneous drop the school lessons, your phone and just go do something fun, goofy and in the moment that makes the kids laugh, and gets them out of their own feelings around school/being home and change in schedule. In this time of Covid, we need to redefine Fun, we need to maximize opportunities to just keep it simple, to seek light in a dark situation, to create the magical out of the mundane, to dream rather than do, to embrace laughter as our love language. Some ways you can create fun: create a top 10 list for family fall fun, do field trips, daily fun breaks, back yard fun, theme family dinners, date night in, watch a comedy on Netflix, call a friend that makes you laugh until you cry, think of funny things over the years, you know the ones that still make you laugh. They say that laughter is the best medicine, we all need a dose of laughter and fun!
So, it is a different season my friends, but remember, you’ve got this, we are in this together and we will not on survive, we will thrive! XO