An Open Letter to a Few Women Leaders
Background:
I have worked with some pretty amazing leaders. I spent 13 years of my life working for a great company with so many great leaders some of which I still embrace their lessons and the positive imprint they made on me. One in particular was a mentor to me. She continues to be a role model and example for me. It was one year ago I made a bold move and left a successful business in the direct sales industry to start over in an emerging company that had a leader and mission I really believed in.
I exited the company professionally and did all the right things, even though it was difficult. I knew I would be leaving some people I cared about and they might be hurt or disappointed that bothered me. However, at the end of the day, I had to make a decision that I thought was best for me, my family, and how I show up in the world and practice what I preach. When I formally resigned, I heard from many leaders that were so kind, that wished me well, and perhaps even respected that I made the decision to follow my heart and purpose and had courage to let go of something good.
A brand or a company is not bigger than me. I do not idolize a brand or people that work for one company--I outgrew it and it was time to honor that and move on and as such I did. Along with well wishes from many wonderful women leaders, there was some awful behavior from a few leaders that had to tell lies in order to explain why I left rather than let me live my truth and handle it professionally, truthfully, and as a real leader. This nonsense and behavior reminds me (and nudges me) that we have so much work to do (it is a larger issue) because any time a woman puts down, lies, or labels another woman, they do it to all of us and isn’t it time we get brave and STAND UP with our hands on our HIPP’s?
Letter:
Dear ________:
It is ironic to me that you consider yourself a top leader(s) when, in fact, some of your behavior goes against what any world class leader would teach. Granted, I do understand you need to protect your business, grow your business, and keep morale high, and you could have achieved that simply by being truthful and not coming up with lies. I am going to be direct, honest, and hope that these words encourage all women leaders in the world to rise up, stand up and demand we be better to each other regardless of profession, company, brand, and any choices we make. When I decided I wanted to start over again with a new emerging company in our industry, you were threatened, and rather than tell your teams (or my team) that it's okay, people sometimes decide to move on (that was her decision), you felt the need to create some lies and tear me down as a leader and person. You said some really awful things and one universal spiritual law that I know is that kind, wholehearted genuine women do not tear down others. They are confident in themselves that they have no need to do this. You attacked me spiritually and you all said lies about me and my colleagues—your words previously and your behavior at this time are incongruent. Need I remind you that the company you love so much (which you have every right to do) was started only because three people left another direct sales business 36 years ago. What if they were too afraid to make that bold move--my guess is that you would not be there today.
As my mother says, what kind of person would put down a woman's choice to do what she thought was best for herself and her family? I do not judge people based on the company, brand, social class, or community they are with. I accept people for who they are and have high expectations for how they treat each other. So, let me give you some leadership advice, and anyone reading this, to be sure you do embrace, practice, and create this in your community. Strong women and true leaders build other leaders up, they don't break them down, period end! They don't tell lies and make up stories to protect what they are afraid of. They accept the truth and act in accordance with grace and integrity. I can assure you God does not want one company in each industry--he is looking for many to grow, expand, and create more strong leaders that support more strong leaders, and he is telling us women that we are missing the mark, some of us. You see, we need to respect each others' decisions and know that there is plenty of abundance for all of us to be successful. God expects us to operate from love, not fear, fear is tearing down others, fear is lying, fear is ego, fear is manipulation, fear is staying the same. Love is positive, love is truth, love is authenticity, love is following your heart, love looks beyond boundaries, love is confident, love is bravery, love is friend and foe, love is so much better than hate. Admittedly, your actions were upsetting to me, not just for me or my colleagues, but for every woman in the world. It is NOT OKAY for women to tear other women down, it is spiritually bankrupt, and perhaps a few of you might want to take your words off of me and reflect a bit on this.
Why write this? I want make you aware and all women in general, that it is not okay to use our tongue to attack another woman. You attack ALL women when you do that. I also want to encourage women all over the world to act and behave differently. It is a choice. I choose to treat people well. I choose to be the world class leader that I am, and I choose to align myself with a company and brand that fits me today and makes me feel most authentic to myself. I know I am showing up bigger because I am aligned with the right company, just as I was aligned with the right company previously, until I wasn't. Life is this interesting journey of twists and turns,. It is not about brands and boundaries,. It is about bravery and being authentic.
My wish for you is that you no longer treat people in this way. That your heart is filled with light and that you build confidence in yourself and the world at large (not just the small silo of a company you are part of) and to expand and grow into a better person, the person that God wants you to be. Thank you for teaching me how and (how not) I want to show up in this world!
